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More Stuff I Found on YouTube

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Published on: August 29, 2007

Another lazy morning, so I’ll just post this video I found on YouTube. This is the Records performing at the Knitting Factory in Los Angeles. Well, not actually The Records, since this “reunion” only includes one original member, John Wicks. It does, however, include Blondie drummer Clem Burke.

The song is “Starry Eyes,” one of the best songs ever written. Yep. I said that. I don’t want to argue, there’s nothing to say…

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

My Name Is…Naw, Too Easy

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Published on: August 28, 2007

I’ve been reading the stories about DMX and his dogs (It is that year, again…after all…), and I noticed a fun little fact. His name is…Earl.

That’s right, tough guy from the mean streets…OG…yeah…Earl.

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

¡Autogol!

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Published on: August 28, 2007

To us soccer fans, there is nothing funnier than an own goal. I’m not talking about those crazy pinball games that happen in the box where the ball ends up going in after caroming off of some defender’s shin guard. I’m talking about butt stupid mistakes that bring shame to a player’s team and family for generations. These are common enough that all fans have a few committed to memory, but rare and precious enough to slowly drink them, like an epicurian does with a fine wine.

Take this thing of beauty that happened with my Revs last saturday. Carlos Mendes tried to do a pass back and hit it too hard. The mistake was compounded when ‘keeper Jon Conway didn’t react quick enough and was forced to dive for the ball. By the way, had Conway managed to snag it, it would surely have resulted in a penalty kick since he was handling a ball that had been passed back. A game that would probably have ended in a tie was instead a win, putting the Revs at 42 points for the season and probably on cruise control for the Supporters Shield.
Conway’s performance on this was so laughable that it has actually made some Red Bulls fans on BigSoccer from saying that Conway should be replaced as back up keeper…by Tony Meola.

By the way, Shep Messing’s “turf” excuse, lame.

The worst part for Red Bulls fans is that this isn’t the first time this has happened. Check this out way back from 1996 when the Red Bulls were the MetroStars and everyone had excessively ugly jerseys. The look on the then-ponytailed Meola is choice. Couple of things to remember about this: the game was tied 0-0, this happened at the very end of the game, and was the MetroStars very first home game. It also was the Revs first win. Ever since, New York fans have blamed their team’s underachievement on the “Curse of Caricola.”

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

Sand Winders…Side Rubies…Um…What?

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Published on: August 26, 2007

Spoke to Rich Hopkins the other night. The man is enthused about the new album by the Sidewinders. Enthused may be the wrong word…amped…giddy…near orgasmic…

Oh, you noticed I said “Sidewinders”?

“Ted, you silly person, they haven’t called themselves that in well over a decade, when they changed their name to the Sand Rubies. What the hell is your problem, Ted? Have you checked the calendar, it isn’t 1989 anymore! Sheesh.”

Au contraire, I used the moniker Sidewinders on purpose. Long time Tucson music fanatics may remember that The band was called the Sidewinders until they were sued in 1993 by some lame ass cover band in the Carolinas called Sidewinder. Since they also were undergoing a label change, and the new label figured that it was easier to have a new name to promote than deal with the legal hassles. So, they became the Sand Rubies. It was hard for them to keep the following they developed under the old name (Yes, doubters, they had a following. One has to remember, on their first big tour, Pearl Jam opened for them), the personality issues within the band didn’t help, and they fell apart.

(Real Tucson music old farts would point out that they were the 700 Club before the Sidewinders. One wonders what legal issues that would have caused.)

They have reunited a few times, and they decided to record again. To talk to Rich, their attitude was “What the heck?” and they are now going to perform and record under the name Sidewinders. I think most of us kept calling them that anyway.

Oh, so Rich tells me that the new album will be out soon. Rich actually said “record,” that is so quaint! I’m expecting a lot. For one, I have memorized the lyrics to “Doesn’t Anyone Believe” and “We Don’t Do That Anymore.” I think I actually know the lyrics better than Dave Slutes does. It is nice to hear them play some new stuff.

Also, those of you that saw High and Dry a few years back saw that Rich and Dave were singing each other’s praises. Rich claiming that Dave was a better vocalist and writer than in the old days, Dave claiming that Rich was a better guitarist and writer than in the old days. Well, good. Let’s see some proof!

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

This Is Me Being a Geek

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Published on: August 25, 2007

There was news this week that Jaime Moreno scored his 109th goal, putting him on top of all MLS players. So, that led me to wonder, how does he stack up with players in the history of all North American first division leagues?

Not well. Moreno’s history making goal puts him solidly in 18th place. These stats come from the American Soccer History Archives.

  1. Archie Stark, Bethlehem Steel – 253
  2. Johnny Nelson, Brooklyn Wanderers – 223
  3. Giorgio Chinaglia, New York Cosmos – 193
  4. Davey Brown, New York Giants – 189
  5. Bill Patterson, various teams – 152
  6. Andy Stevens, New Bedford Whalers – 150
  7. Jerry Best, New Bedford Whalers – 138
  8. Bart McGhee, various teams – 137
  9. Harold Brittain, Fall River Marksmen – 135
  10. Bobby Blair, Boston Wonder Workers – 131
  11. Werner Nilsen, Boston Wonder Workers – 131
  12. Alan Willey, Minnesota Kicks – 129
  13. Karl-Heinz Granitza, Chicago Sting – 128
  14. Tommy Florie, Providence/New Befford – 126
  15. Tec White, Fall River Marksmen – 124
  16. Ron Futcher, Minnesota Kicks – 119
  17. Bert Patenaude, Fall River Marksmen – 118
  18. Jaime Moreno*, DC United – 109
  19. Mike McLeavey, New Bedford Whalers – 108
  20. Jason Kreis, Dallas Burn – 108
  21. Herbert Carlson, New York Nationals – 107
  22. Ante Razov*, Chicago Fire/Chivas USA – 104
  23. Paul Child, San Jose Earthquakes – 102
  24. Illja Mitic, Dallas Tornado – 101
  25. Steve David, various teams – 100

Players with an asterisk are still active. Paul Child, #23 on the list, played for the San Jose Earthquakes of the NASL, rather than MLS.

The top eleven, save one, are all from ASL teams of the 20’s and 30’s. To be fair, these people played in an era when there most teams used only two defenders. The only non-ASL player in the top 11 is Giorgio Chinaglia, who played for the New York Cosmos of the late 1970’s and early 80’s. Tell you what, you put me in front of Pelé, Franz Beckenbauer and Carlos Alberto for a season, and I’ll score 30 goals.

So, who are some of these other people? Archie Stark was a Scottish born striker who played for a couple of teams, but most famously for Bethlehem Steel. He was the leading scorer in the league for most of his career, scoring 67 goals in 1926 (a ridiculous number even by that league’s standards).

The man that Moreno could pass given one more good season is Bert Patenaude. Patenaude not only had a remarkable career in the ASL, but played in the very first World Cup. He is officially on record (as certified by FIFA only last year) as the first player to score a hat-trick in a World Cup final, scoring three against Paraguay.

Moreno, Razov and Kreis have all played longer than any of the people on the list did at eleven seasons (that’s counting Kreis’s retirement shortened season this year). Many of the NASL players on the list had shorter careers here since they came over after careers in Europe. Now, there is the opposite situation with some MLS players. Brian McBride, for example, would surely be on the list had he not gone to Europe. If reckoned in terms of goals per season, the top person on the list would be Bobby Blair, who averaged 32.8 goals in four seasons. The trio from MLS only scored an average of between 9 and 10. If reckoned in goals per game, Patenaude takes all comers at .952 with Chinaglia coming up behind at .906 and Johnny Nelson at .892.

The list only includes those who have scored more than 100 goals. Jeff Cunningham and Taylor Twellman could easilly be on this list at the end of next season. MLS’s top single-season goal scorer, Roy Lassiter, notched 88 during his career, putting him just behind Billy Gonzalves (91 goals).

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

Banned!

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Published on: August 23, 2007

This here blog is now banned from Pima County’s government network. That’s right. Go figure.

Well, actually, all “social networking and personal sites” are now banned. Anything with “blogspot,” “typepad,” or “livejournal” domains are inaccessible. If you try to go on, up pops a page that is similar to what you’d get from a porn site.

MySpace had been similarly blocked for a year. For a while, you could still get on Facebook and Friendster, but no more. Tribe seems to have been haphazardly blocked. I went on yesterday just to see what would happen. I got on, but I got the “this site is inaccessible” page when I tried to see who had been to my page. I guess they only dislike parts of Tribe.

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

Once in a Lifetime

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Published on: August 19, 2007

Once in a Lifetime: The Extraordinary Story of the New York Cosmos is now out on DVD. I rented it over at Casa Video this weekend where they have several copies. This means in a few weeks I should be able to pick up one cheap.

The movie gives a complete rundown of the Cosmos, from the early days when a couple of hundred people were watching complete unknowns play at Hofstra University to the Pelé years to the dissilution of the team brought on by the league’s profligate ways, loss of the TV contract and, oddly, a turn in fortunes by Atari.

The best part is that we get to learn exactly how much of an ass Giorgio Chinaglia is. Yes, he’s even worse that the worn out tubbo that trashes the US team during World Cup broadcasts.

For someone like me who only marginally lived through the period (I was seven when Pelé retired), it is suprising how many big names end up involved in this story, from Ahmet Ertegün to Henry Kissinger. Even Nelson Rockefeller, Mick Jagger and Dustin Hoffman make cameo appearances.

It still suprises me how MLS and American soccer hasn’t really embraced its connections to the NASL. We are past the point where NASL players are in the league any more (Roy Wegerle, Frank Klopas, Hugo Sánchez) and even NASL fans are too old to be playing anymore (Tab Ramos, Joe-Max Moore, Brandi Chastain, Mia Hamm). I guess there are still the connections with coaches (the late Mooch Myernick, Ray Hudson, Thomas Rongen all played in the league, Bruce Arena tried out for and failed to get on the Cosmos).

Three players that I can think of offhand, Taylor Twellman, Alecko Eskandarian and Kenny Cooper, all had fathers that played in the NASL. Twellman’s father, Tim, is seen in one scene taking down a player. Eskandarian’s father, Andranik, is in both of the Soccer Bowl games that are included as bonus features on the DVD.

If you need a reason to check the bonus Soccer Bowl matches, the hair and mustaches on the German players playing in those matches should be good enough.

Piece of trivia about Arena’s career: he failed to play for the Cosmos, but instead played for the minor league Tacoma Tides. The Tides were owned by Booth Gardner, who later was the governor of Washington that declared his state a state of Nirvana back in 1991.

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

Coldcocked

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Published on: August 12, 2007

I am not able to summon up any hate for Coldplay. The reason: they bore me to death. I can’t hate anything that really isn’t all that interesting. It would be like really hating celery.

However, it looks like in one corner of the Pacific Northwest, a certain “little hippie girl” was able to generate the hate. Hippies getting violent over a band? If that isn’t a reason to decriminalize marijuana now, I don’t know what is.

There was karaoke involved, so that may have been the problem.

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

Bone Thugs-N-Harmony

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Published on: August 9, 2007

Here is a video of Bone Thugs-N-Harmony’s recent visit to Drake Middle School. My friend Karan Stewart, wife of regular poster Eric Lybeck, works at the school.

One more funny thing, Rev. John Fife, one of our more high profile Presbyterians who now writes for the Citizen, used a picture of Eric and Karan’s wedding to illustrate an article on marriage earlier this week.

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

Stickin’ it to the MAN!

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Published on: August 9, 2007

So, I got roped into doing one of these surveys that radio stations do, because, heaven forbid, any of them play a song or two that someone out there may not have heard before.

I was in a room with about fifty other people. All of us in there were men, from not so young anymore (me) to middle aged. They paid us sixty bucks a piece. There were more than a few scruffy looking people that looked as though they really needed the cash. I wondered if the fact that such surveys would be stocked with desperate folks like this has any effect on the results.

They played us snippets from more than six hundred songs (our hand held computer devices kept a count) and we were supposed to rate how much we liked the song, or even if we recognized it at all.

Being that I’m one of these smart assed music mavens, I took it as the opporitunity to finally take out my frustrations on bands I am sick of, bands that are overrated by white boy rockers and bands whose fans I dislike. There were a few bands who I made a point of rating all of their songs a “1,” meaning that I disliked the song:

Rolling Stones
Grateful Dead
The Doors
Eddie Money
Boston
REO Speedwagon
Styx
Pink Floyd
Aerosmith
George Thorogood & the Destroyers

Yes, I’m a complete jerk. Pink Floyd, yes, Pink Floyd. But, gosh Ted, Roger Waters is a genius. Yes, yes, I know. But that doesn’t mean I am not sick of his whining, and it doesn’t make the boring David Gilmore led new age band that came after his departure palatable. And Aerosmith. Everyone that has ridden in a car with me for any length of time knows my Aerosmith rule. The Stones…can’t stand their fans. Can’t stand songs like “Shattered” that wouldn’t have made the charts had “The Greatest Rock Band (TM)” not done it. All the other bands on there are self explanatory.

Hasta la proxima. Do zobaczenia.

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